Always Strive for Improvement

FUCKKK

2009-11-29T20:06:12Z

I just found out this exam homework dealing with computer software isn't supposed to be done in a group. FUCKKK this is gonna be so bad!!!

It really sucks when there are the things you are the worst at end you are forced to do it.

I'm never going to even use this software again!! This is stupid and sucks!!!
wah wah wah :(

Opps.. been awhile

2009-11-29T19:30:34Z

I'm waiting for my mom to finish with the computer printer so I can print off my R Lab (that's going to be 20% of my grade) -- I'm not excited to do it. Computer software/program= not my friend!

Oh man... so much has happend and life is really stressfull right now.

Week Schedule:
Tuesday- Mom has test. My R Lab is due.
Wednesday- Mom has Hessy test for nursing
Thursday- I have a Chem test at 7pm that I haven't even read for yet, luckily he drops one.
Friday- 8am Exam 3 for Theatre. Seeing Twilight (bc mom is making me)
Weekend: start studying for finals, hang with friends for maybe a few hours, and maybe get an ear piercing (bc I want one- Idk if i want an industrial $80-- probably not, or just a second piercing on my lobe)

Family:
Pretty personal but--
my grandmother died last month.
Some family members have lost their jobs.
There is going to be a divorce coming soon-- honestly, it's pretty fucked up how that happend. I just found this weekend but apparently it's been going on for 6 months since an Email was sent, basically breaking up the marriage.

Thanksgiving:
Was really really fun!! :)
Got out of school a day earily and got to go to the zoo with my dad Wendesday. Which was so much fun! I love the zoo!! :) Thursday was Thanksgiving, of course, and it was fun getting to spend time with all the new babies of the family.
Friday still hung with the family. Then Friday I got to hang out with one of my bestfriends, who I've really missed, and his boyfriend, who I love too.

One thing that's been really stuggling has been- since all this drama and heartache has happend, it's really hard for me to remember how to talk to people and how I'm supposed to act because the way we socially act seems so strange for some reason. But since I was little and have some connection issues with people, like shyness and it's hard for me to get attached to people because I'm afraid they are going to leave (which I know everyone has that insecurity). Since all this stuff has happend I really have a better apriciation for everyone around me and the little things in life become so much more important. It's funny because I find that I want to remember every little thing that happends throughout the day or week just so that I can appreciate everything around and all the good thngs that I used to take for granted.

So, since the holiday is over--- it's time to go back to school... BAH! I woke up so cranky today because I really don't want to do that Lab lol. FUCKKKKK!!! And I keep forgeting i have to study for two tests that are coming up this week.... BAH!!! NOOOO!!

Things I don't Like

2009-10-08T22:58:49Z

1) Not knowing my own dad's email.
2) sending him an email and waiting for 3 days before a reply
3) sending him a really detailed email full of possible responses and I get 4 sentences.
4)him not responding to my questions about how everything is
5)his not asking me how I am
6)him not making conversation and only concerned with when the next time i'm going up there is. Clearly his concern is not to talk to me.

He makes me feel like a failure as a daughter, which i'm sure if he saw this he would say that. And I know this relationship is why I'm so fucked up. I'm sorry. I just don't understand. I'm gonna go cry now. Bye

Cold, Tired, and hungry :(

2009-10-05T14:11:17Z

God damn! It is so cold outside! It's like 65 degrees. Ok, that doesn't sound very cold, but when you are walking around in jeans and a light sweater, it is!
and I'm so tired and I'm hungry because i skipped breakfast because I felt sick because I ate a pint and a half of ice cream before i went to bed.

This one friend I have from UTSA, who I've been getting really close to, has pretty much for sure decided she is going to leave UT. she doesn't like it here and misses her family. I understand, I just want her to not rush into a decision that she might regret.
Ugh, I got close to someone and they are leaving me, again.

I know Tina has been pretty upset by what some person said to her. She shouldn't take it so hard, I think that person just has a more agressive way of saying things (ie.she doesn't put words in a nice tone, or even nice wording for that matter).

Time

2009-07-26T20:25:13Z

Newborns are welcomed by
tears--of joy or sorrow.
Children are full of hopes and dreams, having
sweet giggling laughter.
Teens trying to figure out their place in the world, they cause
crashes and yelling.
Adults work day-to-day, a routine habit,
tick-tock-tick-tock.
The elderly forget and are forgotten,
silence.

HA i know this sucks, i wrote it in 5 seconds when i should be studying.
-- piece of crap

I'll Love you Forever and a day

2009-07-22T02:11:18Z

Nothing to post

2009-07-19T21:41:40Z

Nothing to post but I got hungry, and look how gorgeous it looks!!

Kiwi+banana+strawberries+rasians=amazing

Grade for US history I ++ cleaning + internet

2009-07-11T21:24:37Z

Got the internet fixed around noon today.

ACC posted grades for first half of the summer semester : A!

Cleaned 3 toilets and half a shower, god, i have to go back.

Need to run but would rather read The Time Traveler's Wife-- I wanna see what happends :)

ps- I'm cleaning because I want tina to come over sometime soon :)
pss- mom's watching Harry Potter, I'm so over these movies

Everyone Loves SUPER JUNIOR!!!

2009-07-10T17:07:14Z

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_43TO_OPj-8

Damn Home Internet- FAIL ++ Hollie Movie ++ Alamo Drafthouse-- fail!

2009-07-10T17:00:12Z

1) Home internet:
We canceled our home phone line so now mom has to go to the ACC Computer lab to do her class work because our home line and DSL line were connected and so when one went out, the both went "bye-bye"

2)Filming with Hollie (and matt):
Yesterday was amazing!! I've been with Daniel and Hollie before while their filming-- weither it's just watching or being an actor--and this was totally different. Normally they have a little camcorder and if you mess up they stop and start again. This was for Hollie's film class. There were actual stage lights (like 50 of them!! O.O ) and really really really nice cameras, like the pros use. I suck at acting and was totally jealous of this skinny guy that had amazing skills. The whole process was really fun, i just wish i was a better actor so whenever i volunteer to help hollie i wouldn't feel like such a noob :( lol.

3) Alamo Drafthouse-- FAIL!
Love the alamo drafthouse movie theater. They are known for throwing weird movies that not a lot of people have heard of and for throwing special events (like for snakes on a plane they had actual snakes runing aroung the theater-- thank god i didn't go XD), But they aren't going to show Blood The Last Vampire- the live action!! I'm so pissed, it looks so good!!! The only places it's playing in Texas are Dallas and Houston-- Damn it!

ps--I think something is wrong with me... the past two days i'm pretty sure i've slept over 24 hours....opps

Master Cleanse Diet

2009-05-25T23:37:01Z

I Just made the stuff i'm going to drink for atleast 10 days.
that means nothing other than that drink and water. I can't drink alcohol at the con!! WAH!
but hopefully this wont be too bad

I'm going to work out too

Take that spanish final!!

2009-05-03T02:07:03Z

<--- that was the shit I had to study for finals!!

Just took the spanish final, hope I did well :(

I recycled all my flashcards and notes :) feels sooo good.
I really hope i did well :(

It didn't help my pride that I kept dropping flashcards ont he ground and people slowed down so they wouldn't have to help me :( -FML

ALL THIS WAS RECYCLED:

UGH! I'm wating till after finals

2009-05-01T01:41:07Z

I just keep eating! and eating
and eating

whatever, my plan is to go on a diet after finals are over MUHA

Excel Group My ASS!

2009-04-28T02:38:14Z

I hate people so much right now.

I just spent 2 and a half hours on something that if my "group" would have worked together instead of being a bunch of assholes it could have been done in 30- 1 hour. Fucking hate this school! I sound like such a wimp but I just wanna go home. Not only are they lazy but they expected me to do all the work for them. Then because of course they are friends with my roommate they come back to our dorm and start messing around by locking Brit out of her room and then everyone keeps banging so I just leave. I hate this shit. I'm so annoyed!

I want people to:
not be lazy
be intelligent
be mature
and to not be an asshole

seriously. Every excel project has been such a struggle to work at least this time they all did something (that ranges from typing our names to typing what I told them to write or how I told them we were supposed to do the project).

I will admit, I am a control freak but this was me HAVING to tell them because they wouldn't even take make the effort to try to learn something.

FUCK THIS SHIT!!!!

--I'm going to finish writing a spanish paper, I SHOULD finish my bio chapter but I'm so frustrated I might just check out a movie then go home. Oh, did I mention how i left MY dorm room because they were Loud and Abnoxious!?

---I am proud David was defending me (a little) or atleast helping me try to get some of the other people to help . *kudos* that made me happy just so it wasn't just me :(

--- oh, for the first time I got mad at someone using a curseword. Fucking eric

Are we weird?

2009-04-25T18:12:26Z

I know the anime kids are steriotyped as being weird, but I've never really thought of myself as weird. wait, scratch that, sometimes I do stuff on purpose to be weird. But have I become some used to being weird that I do it unintentionally? o.O

I've been acting, what I consider, NORMAL and people here calling me "the weirdest friend they have" or "the weirdest resident" eh. Like my RA, Amber, Jason A. and probably Brittney.

UGH! How frustrating

Star Trek Movie :2-- spoiler

2009-04-22T19:58:08Z

BAHHH

My thoughts:
WHHHHAAATTT the fuck! that movie made me mad/sad!

They killed off my favorite character, but apparently he comes back. My mom is on the phone explaining the next two movies ^__^

Dear lord food

2009-04-20T18:29:44Z

today, i ate sooo much. this is bullshit. I was influenced by my friend allie sitting next to me eating so i kept eating.

breakfast: omelete, cottage cheese, and half a buiscuit and gravy
Lunch: piece of pizza, cottage cheese, soup, salad, chips, 2 cookies, 1 brownie, and piece of pie

Never realised how much i DON'T want you next to me until you were gone

2009-04-20T02:22:08Z

This is not a love post.
It's not really even a hate post.
It's an akward post(?).
I'm realising my roommates friends aren't as nice or cool as I originally thought, in fact some of the males are just down right mean.
I was studying with one of them and it was just akward. and tense.
when he left I felt much better

Day Plan

2009-04-20T02:19:47Z

I'm on the phone with Mom.
After i get off I'm going to:
brush teeth
maybe grab something at ~~starbucks or~~ the cafateria
Then to the Library to study all my Labs from bio lab then Spanish vocab if I have time.

Study Time

2009-04-19T17:07:35Z

Room Quality

2009-04-19T16:11:43Z

I have been living in ~~sin~~ Bug.

This year my dorm room has been pretty gross.
1)Nats! I hate nates, we had them really bad in the sink last semester but still have a few this semester. It was so bad I would wake up with bug bites on my legs :(
2) cockroaches- we have had some of those, but what place doesn't? The only really sightings of them have been in the bathrooms and the first week of school when we saw one on Deidre's ceiling. LOL good times, she hit it and it landed somewhere on her desk but we could never find it. SO GROSS!!
3)Maggots. Brittney, the roommate that lives on my side decided to leave two black trashbags between our rooms for a week or two. we got maggots. lovely! It was around Halloween because our pumpkins got maggots too. gross!
4) "THE SMELL" ugh. 1/4 of the time our room smells horrible. It's none of our faults it's something with the plumbing or something. None of our friends that live in chapperell have it. Lucky us! Fuck.

Not The real Me

2009-04-18T16:12:19Z

I like to party it's fine but I don't want anyone to get the wrong impression of me. I might come off as having some bad habits but the only reason I do 90% of that stuff is because I feel like we are early adults and I feel like that is expected of me. For example, a popular girl acting like a bitch because they feel that's how the steriotypical popular person should act.

New rule: "Don't Go To Bed Drunk"

2009-04-18T16:06:19Z

oh god!!!!!
I woke up still a little drunk.
was not a good night
apparently I like to flirt when I'm drunk and if i can't flirt or get my way... I cry. wtf!
so.. i feel really bad for my friends AJ and AG because I was crying over nothing with them. I hope I didn't ruin their night. The whole crying thing... kind of ruined my night. FML.
I still have a headache. and I can still taste the orange juice of my screw driver down my throat. FML.

Personal record: still have never thrown up due to alcohol XP

High School Musical.... really?

2009-04-18T16:01:25Z

1st-Nicole is obsessed with all these stupid disney movies (hannah montana, zac and corey, etc.) She is also in love with High school musical. Which is fine, I'll respect that. but she only watched 15 minutes with me (because she had a meeting to go to) but she was full out singing all the songs and reciting the lines. once again, that's fine BUT i know for a fact that was at least the 10th time she'd seen it. HOW THE FUCK COULD YOU, as an adult, PUT UP WITH THAT STUPID MOVIE OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER!!!! wtf.
anyways,
*The first one was good.
good enough for a sequel.
*second one was utter crap- I'm a movie lover and will sit through any movie no matter how bad, just because you have to see how it ends, you know? There have only been two movies that have been so bad I've had to walk out of the room so that my brain cells aren't wasted (I'm saving those important cells to be lost on alcohol). The first movie was The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor (2008)and the second was High school Musical 2.
*The third one? it was alright. It seemed like a downer, really depressing but it is SENIOR year so it's abot saying goodbye. I'm proud they captured that emotion. Kudos. Once again it seemed Zac Effron had his own personal music video again. because his life is soooo hard, he's a whinny little rich kid.

ANYWAYS--> the only reason I wrote about this at all is because I found this SNL clip of zac effron making fun of the unrealistic impressions and expectations it gives little kids about "real life". MUHA!

Jessica's Birthday party!

2009-04-14T02:06:14Z

I'm so glad it went over well!
It was really fun!
~decorated with Tina and Hollie.
Matt and Kim showed up and we tried to surprise Jessica but her dad opened the door before she did :( still fun!

Had:
and easter egg hunt
food
rock band
and kareoke!!

I really miss all of them! it's going to be so much fun when I move back to Austin

ps- now i'm sick. blah!