Nothing Great in Life is Ever Easy

Things I don't Like

Thu, 08 Oct 2009 22:58:49 GMT

1) Not knowing my own dad's email.
2) sending him an email and waiting for 3 days before a reply
3) sending him a really detailed email full of possible responses and I get 4 sentences.
4)him not responding to my questions about how everything is
5)his not asking me how I am
6)him not making conversation and only concerned with when the next time i'm going up there is. Clearly his concern is not to talk to me.

He makes me feel like a failure as a daughter, which i'm sure if he saw this he would say that. And I know this relationship is why I'm so fucked up. I'm sorry. I just don't understand. I'm gonna go cry now. Bye

Cold, Tired, and hungry :(

Mon, 05 Oct 2009 14:11:17 GMT

God damn! It is so cold outside! It's like 65 degrees. Ok, that doesn't sound very cold, but when you are walking around in jeans and a light sweater, it is!
and I'm so tired and I'm hungry because i skipped breakfast because I felt sick because I ate a pint and a half of ice cream before i went to bed.

This one friend I have from UTSA, who I've been getting really close to, has pretty much for sure decided she is going to leave UT. she doesn't like it here and misses her family. I understand, I just want her to not rush into a decision that she might regret.
Ugh, I got close to someone and they are leaving me, again.

I know Tina has been pretty upset by what some person said to her. She shouldn't take it so hard, I think that person just has a more agressive way of saying things (ie.she doesn't put words in a nice tone, or even nice wording for that matter).

Time

Sun, 26 Jul 2009 20:25:13 GMT

Newborns are welcomed by
tears--of joy or sorrow.
Children are full of hopes and dreams, having
sweet giggling laughter.
Teens trying to figure out their place in the world, they cause
crashes and yelling.
Adults work day-to-day, a routine habit,
tick-tock-tick-tock.
The elderly forget and are forgotten,
silence.

HA i know this sucks, i wrote it in 5 seconds when i should be studying.
-- piece of crap

I'll Love you Forever and a day

Wed, 22 Jul 2009 02:11:18 GMT

Nothing to post

Sun, 19 Jul 2009 21:41:40 GMT

Nothing to post but I got hungry, and look how gorgeous it looks!!

Kiwi+banana+strawberries+rasians=amazing

Grade for US history I ++ cleaning + internet

Sat, 11 Jul 2009 21:24:37 GMT

Got the internet fixed around noon today.

ACC posted grades for first half of the summer semester : A!

Cleaned 3 toilets and half a shower, god, i have to go back.

Need to run but would rather read The Time Traveler's Wife-- I wanna see what happends :)

ps- I'm cleaning because I want tina to come over sometime soon :)
pss- mom's watching Harry Potter, I'm so over these movies

Everyone Loves SUPER JUNIOR!!!

Fri, 10 Jul 2009 17:07:14 GMT

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_43TO_OPj-8

Damn Home Internet- FAIL ++ Hollie Movie ++ Alamo Drafthouse-- fail!

Fri, 10 Jul 2009 17:00:12 GMT

1) Home internet:
We canceled our home phone line so now mom has to go to the ACC Computer lab to do her class work because our home line and DSL line were connected and so when one went out, the both went "bye-bye"

2)Filming with Hollie (and matt):
Yesterday was amazing!! I've been with Daniel and Hollie before while their filming-- weither it's just watching or being an actor--and this was totally different. Normally they have a little camcorder and if you mess up they stop and start again. This was for Hollie's film class. There were actual stage lights (like 50 of them!! O.O ) and really really really nice cameras, like the pros use. I suck at acting and was totally jealous of this skinny guy that had amazing skills. The whole process was really fun, i just wish i was a better actor so whenever i volunteer to help hollie i wouldn't feel like such a noob :( lol.

3) Alamo Drafthouse-- FAIL!
Love the alamo drafthouse movie theater. They are known for throwing weird movies that not a lot of people have heard of and for throwing special events (like for snakes on a plane they had actual snakes runing aroung the theater-- thank god i didn't go XD), But they aren't going to show Blood The Last Vampire- the live action!! I'm so pissed, it looks so good!!! The only places it's playing in Texas are Dallas and Houston-- Damn it!

ps--I think something is wrong with me... the past two days i'm pretty sure i've slept over 24 hours....opps

Master Cleanse Diet

Mon, 25 May 2009 23:37:01 GMT

I Just made the stuff i'm going to drink for atleast 10 days.
that means nothing other than that drink and water. I can't drink alcohol at the con!! WAH!
but hopefully this wont be too bad

I'm going to work out too

Take that spanish final!!

Sun, 03 May 2009 02:07:03 GMT

<--- that was the shit I had to study for finals!!

Just took the spanish final, hope I did well :(

I recycled all my flashcards and notes :) feels sooo good.
I really hope i did well :(

It didn't help my pride that I kept dropping flashcards ont he ground and people slowed down so they wouldn't have to help me :( -FML

ALL THIS WAS RECYCLED:

UGH! I'm wating till after finals

Fri, 01 May 2009 01:41:07 GMT

I just keep eating! and eating
and eating

whatever, my plan is to go on a diet after finals are over MUHA

Excel Group My ASS!

Tue, 28 Apr 2009 02:38:14 GMT

I hate people so much right now.

I just spent 2 and a half hours on something that if my "group" would have worked together instead of being a bunch of assholes it could have been done in 30- 1 hour. Fucking hate this school! I sound like such a wimp but I just wanna go home. Not only are they lazy but they expected me to do all the work for them. Then because of course they are friends with my roommate they come back to our dorm and start messing around by locking Brit out of her room and then everyone keeps banging so I just leave. I hate this shit. I'm so annoyed!

I want people to:
not be lazy
be intelligent
be mature
and to not be an asshole

seriously. Every excel project has been such a struggle to work at least this time they all did something (that ranges from typing our names to typing what I told them to write or how I told them we were supposed to do the project).

I will admit, I am a control freak but this was me HAVING to tell them because they wouldn't even take make the effort to try to learn something.

FUCK THIS SHIT!!!!

--I'm going to finish writing a spanish paper, I SHOULD finish my bio chapter but I'm so frustrated I might just check out a movie then go home. Oh, did I mention how i left MY dorm room because they were Loud and Abnoxious!?

---I am proud David was defending me (a little) or atleast helping me try to get some of the other people to help . *kudos* that made me happy just so it wasn't just me :(

--- oh, for the first time I got mad at someone using a curseword. Fucking eric

Are we weird?

Sat, 25 Apr 2009 18:12:26 GMT

I know the anime kids are steriotyped as being weird, but I've never really thought of myself as weird. wait, scratch that, sometimes I do stuff on purpose to be weird. But have I become some used to being weird that I do it unintentionally? o.O

I've been acting, what I consider, NORMAL and people here calling me "the weirdest friend they have" or "the weirdest resident" eh. Like my RA, Amber, Jason A. and probably Brittney.

UGH! How frustrating

Star Trek Movie :2-- spoiler

Wed, 22 Apr 2009 19:58:08 GMT

BAHHH

My thoughts:
WHHHHAAATTT the fuck! that movie made me mad/sad!

They killed off my favorite character, but apparently he comes back. My mom is on the phone explaining the next two movies ^__^

Dear lord food

Mon, 20 Apr 2009 18:29:44 GMT

today, i ate sooo much. this is bullshit. I was influenced by my friend allie sitting next to me eating so i kept eating.

breakfast: omelete, cottage cheese, and half a buiscuit and gravy
Lunch: piece of pizza, cottage cheese, soup, salad, chips, 2 cookies, 1 brownie, and piece of pie

Never realised how much i DON'T want you next to me until you were gone

Mon, 20 Apr 2009 02:22:08 GMT

This is not a love post.
It's not really even a hate post.
It's an akward post(?).
I'm realising my roommates friends aren't as nice or cool as I originally thought, in fact some of the males are just down right mean.
I was studying with one of them and it was just akward. and tense.
when he left I felt much better

Day Plan

Mon, 20 Apr 2009 02:19:47 GMT

I'm on the phone with Mom.
After i get off I'm going to:
brush teeth
maybe grab something at ~~starbucks or~~ the cafateria
Then to the Library to study all my Labs from bio lab then Spanish vocab if I have time.

Study Time

Sun, 19 Apr 2009 17:07:35 GMT

Room Quality

Sun, 19 Apr 2009 16:11:43 GMT

I have been living in ~~sin~~ Bug.

This year my dorm room has been pretty gross.
1)Nats! I hate nates, we had them really bad in the sink last semester but still have a few this semester. It was so bad I would wake up with bug bites on my legs :(
2) cockroaches- we have had some of those, but what place doesn't? The only really sightings of them have been in the bathrooms and the first week of school when we saw one on Deidre's ceiling. LOL good times, she hit it and it landed somewhere on her desk but we could never find it. SO GROSS!!
3)Maggots. Brittney, the roommate that lives on my side decided to leave two black trashbags between our rooms for a week or two. we got maggots. lovely! It was around Halloween because our pumpkins got maggots too. gross!
4) "THE SMELL" ugh. 1/4 of the time our room smells horrible. It's none of our faults it's something with the plumbing or something. None of our friends that live in chapperell have it. Lucky us! Fuck.

Not The real Me

Sat, 18 Apr 2009 16:12:19 GMT

I like to party it's fine but I don't want anyone to get the wrong impression of me. I might come off as having some bad habits but the only reason I do 90% of that stuff is because I feel like we are early adults and I feel like that is expected of me. For example, a popular girl acting like a bitch because they feel that's how the steriotypical popular person should act.

New rule: "Don't Go To Bed Drunk"

Sat, 18 Apr 2009 16:06:19 GMT

oh god!!!!!
I woke up still a little drunk.
was not a good night
apparently I like to flirt when I'm drunk and if i can't flirt or get my way... I cry. wtf!
so.. i feel really bad for my friends AJ and AG because I was crying over nothing with them. I hope I didn't ruin their night. The whole crying thing... kind of ruined my night. FML.
I still have a headache. and I can still taste the orange juice of my screw driver down my throat. FML.

Personal record: still have never thrown up due to alcohol XP

High School Musical.... really?

Sat, 18 Apr 2009 16:01:25 GMT

1st-Nicole is obsessed with all these stupid disney movies (hannah montana, zac and corey, etc.) She is also in love with High school musical. Which is fine, I'll respect that. but she only watched 15 minutes with me (because she had a meeting to go to) but she was full out singing all the songs and reciting the lines. once again, that's fine BUT i know for a fact that was at least the 10th time she'd seen it. HOW THE FUCK COULD YOU, as an adult, PUT UP WITH THAT STUPID MOVIE OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER!!!! wtf.
anyways,
*The first one was good.
good enough for a sequel.
*second one was utter crap- I'm a movie lover and will sit through any movie no matter how bad, just because you have to see how it ends, you know? There have only been two movies that have been so bad I've had to walk out of the room so that my brain cells aren't wasted (I'm saving those important cells to be lost on alcohol). The first movie was The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor (2008)and the second was High school Musical 2.
*The third one? it was alright. It seemed like a downer, really depressing but it is SENIOR year so it's abot saying goodbye. I'm proud they captured that emotion. Kudos. Once again it seemed Zac Effron had his own personal music video again. because his life is soooo hard, he's a whinny little rich kid.

ANYWAYS--> the only reason I wrote about this at all is because I found this SNL clip of zac effron making fun of the unrealistic impressions and expectations it gives little kids about "real life". MUHA!

Jessica's Birthday party!

Tue, 14 Apr 2009 02:06:14 GMT

I'm so glad it went over well!
It was really fun!
~decorated with Tina and Hollie.
Matt and Kim showed up and we tried to surprise Jessica but her dad opened the door before she did :( still fun!

Had:
and easter egg hunt
food
rock band
and kareoke!!

I really miss all of them! it's going to be so much fun when I move back to Austin

ps- now i'm sick. blah!

Fuck my god damn mother fucking life

Mon, 30 Mar 2009 18:43:53 GMT

Spanish is killing me!
this stupid oral! Hollie and I spent 7 hours working on a a 3 minute video project and turns out i need two more minutes TT.TT So i have to go to austin again!

Dear Insomniac Diary,

Tue, 24 Mar 2009 04:18:57 GMT

I'm tired. Wow, no shit.
The feeling passes though, I get semi-tired for a bit, then I'm wide awake with nothing to do at 4 AM in the morning.
I heard that when you get depressed you sleeping pattern changes: either more or less.
I found this book at the utsa library, it was so weird, it was like it was following me.
I'd seen it in the book store when the last weekend of spring break and some other places, and online while I was trying to find a book.
It might not be such a good thing, idk I find it really interesting. The book is a diary in the life of Nikki Sixxi the song writter and former heroin addict/coke addict.

I set my alarm to wake up for 6:50am so I can work out at the gym because I'm getting fat... I'm debating weither to skip it just because I fear if I work out I'm going to pass out because of lack of energy.... I'm feeling kind of dizzy right now... I might choos the latter option... fuck.

So my goal is this: get to 125lb or 120lb and go to Padre Island over the summer break.
man.. i really wana get a jump start on working out though... I think I'll risk passing out. MMMM i'm so wise (dumb ass me)